


'Umi Alsuwbir

by Rina_san28



Series: Overwatch Fluff Fest [3]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Ana Amari is a saint, Drunken Shenanigans, Established Relationship, F/M, Humor, M/M, Multi, Parent Reaper | Gabriel Reyes, Parent Soldier: 76 | Jack Morrison, Pre-Fall of Overwatch, Team as Family, seriously this is so frickin funny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 14:44:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17448992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rina_san28/pseuds/Rina_san28
Summary: “No, it’s alright,” Ana said. “I’ve got the perfect memory picked out.” Jack looked at her in mild surprise, but she continued on, biting her cheek lightly to keep from smiling. “Today is December third, yes?” He nodded. “Excellent. Sit down, you two, I want to be able to see the entire room.”“Is it story time?” Genji asked, visibly perking up as the two old soldiers on the monitor did as instructed.“It’s story time,” she said. Then she blinked. “How many of you are there?”“A lot!” a girl near the center of the dogpile of people chirped. “We’ll introduce everyone later, Captain Amari. Go ahead!”Ana mentally shrugged. “Very well. Anyway. Nine years ago as of two days from now, my husband and I went out for a much-belated anniversary dinner..."December 5th, 2067 - The story in action.orHow Reinhardt, Gabriel, Jesse, and Genji formed the freshest squad in Overwatch.





	'Umi Alsuwbir

**Author's Note:**

> Another!
> 
> This takes place nine years before the first story, but you absolutely don't need to have read it to get this sucker. Here it is: the full story behind Ana's memory match. I'm stupidly amused by this, just so you know. 
> 
> The Ana/Sam tag is full of so much sad. It needs a little more love. 
> 
> Enjoy!

**5 December 2067. Watchpoint: Grand Mesa.**

_Knock knock knock_

 

“Are you ready to go, sweetheart?”

 

Ana hummed to herself as she turned to face the open door, smiling at the man leaning against the frame. “In a moment.” She held out a necklace. “Fasten this for me?”

 

“Of course.” Sam walked over as she turned back to the mirror, taking the chain from her. He fiddled with the clasp for a moment before he managed to get it fastened. “These are not made for left-handed people,” he grumbled, pressing a kiss to the back of her neck. “I think it’s time to start a revolution.”

 

“You do that, dear.”

 

“You look lovely.”

 

She grinned, offering up a cheeky wink. “You clean up decently enough, I suppose.”

 

“Ouch!”

 

“I’ve been waiting for this for ages,” Ana admitted as they left her quarters arm-in-arm. “The worst part is, I know it’s my fault we’re so late.”

 

“You’re doing important work!” Sam said. “I did my fair share of anniversary-ruining. We can share the trophy for worst spouse.”

 

“Darling, you know I don’t share.”

 

He smirked. “I’ve noticed.” Ana whacked him, and he let out a chuckle. “Sorry, sorry. But it’s seriously fine, and besides, at least you’re based close enough right now that we didn’t have to borrow one of the postage stamps Overwatch calls their company cars.”

 

She had to admit, he did have a point. Ana had just come off of a two-month mission string in Indonesia, and, much to her delight, had been recalled to the Overwatch base in Colorado with the rest of the main strike team. Even better, she had arrived to discover that Jack and Gabriel had notified her husband of her location and he was there on the landing pad to meet her.

 

That led to their current situation. The two of them, going out to celebrate their wedding anniversary…nearly three-and-a-half months late.

 

“And you’re sure the base won’t fall down without you here?” Sam teased.

 

She rolled her eyes. “The others are quite thoroughly occupied,” she assured him. “Torbjörn lost some kind of bet during their mission in Louisiana, so most of the team is out doing a bar crawl.”

 

“Can’t wait to see how _that_ turns out,” he said with a snort of amusement.

 

“Well, if I have my way, we will be otherwise occupied by the time they come back.”

 

Sam smiled down at her, dark eyes twinkling. “Captain Amari, I like the way you think.”

 

\-----

 

Dinner was amazing. The two of them fell easily back into their banter, comfortable with each other in the way that nearly thirty years of marriage made people. Stories were swapped about her work, his new hobbies in the wake of his recent retirement, updates on their beloved daughter – anything and everything that had been missed in the six months they’d been separated. Ana couldn’t remember the last time she’d gone out somewhere and truly relaxed; any quality time she got with Sam in person was usually spent curled up on the sofa, or curled up in bed, or…

 

Ahem.

 

They were most of the way through their entrees, giggling at a video of Jesse on some very strong pain meds, when her phone rang with a call from the man himself.

 

Ana frowned, mildly concerned. “He never calls,” she said, “not even on my birthday. And he knows what tonight is!”

 

“Answer it,” Sam said, looking slightly worried for his not-son. “What if he’s gotten himself arrested again? Or stuck in a storm drain?”

 

She snorted, but put the call on speaker. _“Marhabaan, habibi_. What’s going on?”

 

_“Hiya, Ma! Hoow’s yer night with the…with yer…guy?”_

 

Sam bit his lip to hold back a chuckle at the cowboy’s obvious drunkenness, and Ana allowed herself an eye roll. “It is going very well, Jesse. He can hear you.”

 

_“Neato! How’re ya doin’, Pappy?”_

 

“I’m doing great, kid,” he said. “You sound like you’re having fun.”

 

 _“Yeaaah…”_ Jesse said, _“that’s why I’m callin’, sorta. I mean, wanted to say hi an’ all, but me an’ some of the others need a bit of a – an arm? Hand?”_

 

“Who’s with you? Ana asked.

 

_“It’s just Dad, Rein, an’ Genji. Oh, an’ me. ‘R‘body else fucked off.”_

 

“Did you get arrested?”

 

_“Nah.”_

 

“Are you about to get arrested?”

 

_“Nahhh.”_

 

“Do you need medical attention?”

 

_“…Maybe.”_

 

Ana immediately began to run through a mental list of possible medical emergencies. “Are any of you bleeding, have broken bones, concussions-”

 

_“We’re all bleedin’.”_

 

She took the call off speaker as Sam waved their waiter down for the check. “Where are you bleeding from? Heads, limbs, torsos?”

 

_“…Nips.”_

 

“…Your…nipples?” she asked, blinking in confusion.

 

_“Yeah. We got ‘em pierced.”_

 

“You all got your nipples pierced,” she said flatly. Across from her, Sam shoved his first in his mouth to muffle his sudden burst of laughter. “Jesse, why are you calling me?”

 

 _“Torby left us!”_ Jesse said, sounding distraught. _“We were lookin’ around the last bar and couldn’t find ‘im, an’ the bartender said he took off. So we were wanderin’ around tryin’ to find ‘im, an’ Rein saw the li’l piercin’ place, an’ we thought what the hay, it’ll be fun, an’ now we’re out here jus’ the four of us an’ we gotta get back but we ain’t got money for a cab ‘cause Torby was drivin’ but he left us.”_

 

She sighed. “Let me get this straight: you couldn’t find Torbjörn, so instead of calling him, you all left the bar, and on a whim decided you needed matching nipple piercings.” She paused, offering an apologetic smile to the waiter as he shot her an odd look, mouthing _kids, right?_ to a nod of sympathy. “And now you want Sam and I to take you back to base?”

 

 _“Yes, ma’am!”_ he said cheerfully. _“Will ya? We’re on the corner of 4 th an’ Sycamore.”_

 

Sam took her phone as he helped her into her coat. “Don’t worry about it, bud, we’ll be there in a bit. We’ve got my truck, so keep a lookout for us, okay?”

 

_“Okie-dokie! Buh-bye!”_

 

The moment the line went dead, he began to laugh hysterically. “Ana, oh my god, I can’t believe this.”

 

“I suppose it means that Genji’s adjusting to people better, which is a good sign,” Ana said between her own giggles. “Do you still have that phone stand in your truck? We are going to need a lot of keepsakes from this.”

 

“Darling,” he said, opening the door for her with a sweeping bow, “when have I ever let you down?”

 

\-----

 

It took them less than five minutes to reach the tattoo parlor, and less than five seconds to identify the pile of people sitting on the sidewalk outside. A young woman, most likely one of the artists, was standing nearby.

 

“Are these yours?” she called as Ana dropped down out of the truck.

 

“Unfortunately,” she said. “Hello, boys.”

 

“Heyyyy, Ma,” Jesse slurred. “Sorry for interruptin’ yer food.”

 

“You can pay us back when you’re sober,” Sam told him.

 

“I’m so sorry about them,” Ana whispered to the woman, but she just laughed.

 

“They weren’t a problem at all!” she said. “Actually, they were the nicest clients I’d had all night. I just wanted to make sure they got home safe, especially since they insisted on waiting outside. Paranoid, those ones, but I figure with what you guys do and all, it makes sense.”

 

Ana smiled ruefully. “Military is a curse sometimes,” she said. They watched as Sam dragged Gabriel to his feet, directing him to the backseat of the truck. “I don’t have cash on me or I would offer you a tip.”

 

“Don’t worry about it, ma’am, really,” the woman said. Tentatively, she reached out and placed a hand on Ana’s shoulder. “There was a quake out here a few years back, and Overwatch got my little nieces out and safe. You guys are doing good work. Besides,” she grinned, “they tipped me fifty percent. I’d say that covers it.”

 

“Ooo, I like you,” Ana said, grinning back. “Get back inside, it’s chilly here tonight. I can wrangle my children.” With one final wave to the group, the artist did as she was told, and Ana returned her attention to the men in front of her. “Matching nipple piercings.”

 

“We aren’t really fully matching,” Gabriel protested, pulling himself up into the back. “We all have different ones, and Shimada’s only got one nip anyway.”

 

“But it is a good nip, and now a sparkly one,” Genji said, “see?” He lifted his sweatshirt to show off the glittery rainbow ring. “I chose it because I am gay.”

 

“It looks great, kid,” Sam said, giggling. “C’mon, up you get.”

 

“You’re lucky we have the cover on the truck bed, old friend,” Ana told Reinhardt as he heaved his massive frame off the pavement, “because that’s where _you_ are going to ride.”

 

“It is not a problem!” Reinhart said. “I have ridden in worse!” After a false, swaying start, he lumbered over to the bed, opened the hatch, and tossed himself in on his stomach. This was evidently a poor decision, as he immediately yelled out in pain. “ _Scheiße!_ My nipples!”

 

Sam choked on his laughter, leaning against the side of the truck for support as he lost any attempt at composure. With what felt like the millionth eyeroll of the night, Ana pushed Jesse into the backseat, trusting Gabriel to pull his son up the rest of the way, and plucked the keys from her husband’s hands. “I’ve got this, _aleaziz_. You are now on camera duty.”

 

“Aye aye, Captain,” he gasped out, offering a weak salute. “Oh, sweet Jesus, this is the fucking best. What is normal?”

 

“Probably a lot more boring,” Ana said. “Buckle up, boys.” She started the slow drive out of the city, thinking up the best ways to embarrass her closest friends. “Genji showed us his piecing, but what did the rest of you get?”

 

“I’ve got li’l skeleton hands,” Gabriel said, lifting his customary hoodie and t-shirt to display the silver bars, obvious against his dark skin, “Rein’s got light-ups, and Jesse’s got…what’d you get, _mijo?”_

 

“I got the fuckin’ uhhhh gun ones,” Jesse said. “Like Peacekeeper, y’know?”

 

“You got bars that look like your gun?” Sam asked.

 

“Yeah! Lookit!” Jesse lifted his shirt to show off the crystal-encrusted monstrosities. “Cute, right?”

 

Gabriel looked Sam directly in the eye, his face completely sincere. “Jesse and I have a father-son bond that can never be broken. We are tied together by our nipples.”

 

“Are you recording?” Ana whispered, and Sam nodded, struggling to keep his giggles quiet while also holding his phone steady. “Put it in the holder, it’ll be easier. Reinhart?” she said, raising her voice slightly.

 

_“Ja?”_

 

“Are you doing alright?”

 

“I am _great!_ Very comfortable!”

 

“Hey Rein!” Jesse said, a shit-eating grin on his face. “Is there, uh, updog back there?”

 

“He isn’t going to do it, McCree,” Genji said.

 

“Is there what?” Reinhardt asked, lifting his head and shoving his face in the back window.

 

“Is there any updog in the truck bed?” Jesse asked.

 

 _“Was_? What is updog?”

 

The effect was instantaneous. Jesse and Gabriel began to cackle, and Genji bent over in his seat in a giggle fit. Sam, who had thankfully put the phone in its holder, had his head in his hands, shoulders shaking. Ana raised an eyebrow, bottling her own giggles in favor of playing it straight in hopes of further reaction.

 

“That was very mature,” she said as tears began streaming down Jesse’s face. “Fareeha had mastered that joke by the time she was ten.

 

“I am still not understanding you, McCree!” Reinhardt said. “What is updog?”

 

“Let it go, Rein, we’ll talk about it in the morning.”

 

“But what’s updog?”

 

 _“Sadiq_ , please.”

 

“Hey, Reinhardt,” Genji said, “is there a buttfor back there?”

 

“What is a buttfor?” The entire backseat howled as a look of illumination crossed the old crusader’s face. “Ah! I get it! That is very funny.”

 

 _“Khms daqayiq_ ,” Ana muttered, dragging a hand down her face, “ _khms daqayiq faqat_.”

 

Sam reached over an placed a comforting hand on her knee. “You can do it, sweetheart. I believe in you.”

 

“I’m suddenly very glad that Fareeha moved back to Cairo before she reached the full drinking age,” she said dryly. “Remind me to call her and tell her how much I appreciate her.”

 

“Just send her the video, I think she’ll get the message.”

 

\-----

 

Ana let out a sigh of relief as she pulled into the parking lot. Amusing as her drunk friends were, they were also very loud, extremely stupid, and, worst of all, biting into her evening with her husband. She parked in the unloading zone and dropped down from the truck. “Come on, gentlemen. Out you get.”

 

“Did you bring back our missing drunks?” she turned around to see Jack leaning against a column, grinning at her.

 

“Ours?” she said. “No, Jack, at least two of these are definitely yours, three if I’m reading Gabriel correctly.”

 

Jack shrugged. “What can I say? My husband has a love of lost and broken things.”

 

“Wait until you see what they’ve done,” Sam said, popping open the back hatch and pulling Reinhardt out. “They’re never gonna live this one down.”

 

“Thank you, friend!” Reinhardt boomed. “I can get back. Have a wonderful night!” With what was probably supposed to be a wink, he sauntered off past Jack into the living quarters.

 

“Howdy, Pops!” Jesse said, dropping down into Ana’s arms. “Howww’s it goin’?”

 

“Hoo boy,” Jack said under his breath.

 

“Dad an’ I got stuff!”

 

“What’d you get, buddy?” Jesse flipped his shirt up in response. “Holy shit.”

 

“Hey there _cariño,_ ” Gabriel said. He strolled up to Jack and slipped an arm around his waist. “You’re looking _fine_ tonight.”

 

Jack raised an eyebrow, but reciprocated the affection. “I’m in my pajamas.”

 

“They make your package look _real_ nice.”

 

“Okay!” Sam said, clapping his hands. “In you go! Sober ‘em up, Jack!”

 

“I’ll try. Morrison-Reyes clan out.” The strike commander proceeded to grab his husband by the hand and his son by the shirt collar and drag them rather unceremoniously inside.

 

“Genji,” Ana said, turning her attention to the last member of the party, “will you be alright getting back to your room, or do you need us to come with you?”

 

Genji hopped out with a surprising amount of grace, then placed a hand on her shoulder. “ _Okaa-san_ ,” he said seriously, “I am a ninja cyborg, trained from birth to be the sneakiest ever.” He swayed slightly, tugging on her to right himself. “I got this.”

 

“Of course,” Ana deadpanned, “how could I forget?” Sam sobbed with laughter and collapsed to the ground, completely red in the face. “Goodnight, _habibi_. Get some rest. I’ll come check on you in the morning.”

 

“Thank you, _Okaa-san_. Goodnight. Goodnight, _Otou-san_.”

 

“G’night, kiddo,” Sam gasped out. He made it to his feet as the young man melted into the shadows. “Oh god. Fuck. That was good. I love you so much.”

 

“I know,” Ana said. She bit her lip, finally beginning to lose her composure. “I cannot believe I kept that up the whole time.”

 

“You are a miracle.”

 

“I am!” she said, and it set him off again. “I am, and I deserve to be recognized as such. I’ve raised so many children – breathe, _habibata_ – and only one of them was actually mine.”

 

Sam took a few deep breaths, wiping away tears. “Okay, I think I’m good. How’s about we park this sucker and continue our evening, hmm?”

 

Ana smiled, warm and sweet. “I think that is a wonderful idea.”

**Author's Note:**

>  **Translations:**  
>  Arabic:  
> 'Umi Alsuwbir - supermom  
> marhabaan - hello  
> habibi - term of affection for a man  
> aleaziz - dear  
> sadiq - friend  
> khms daqayiq, khms daqayiq faqat - five more minutes, just five more minutes  
> habibata - my love  
> German:   
> scheiße - shit  
> ja - yes  
> was - what  
> Spanish:   
> mijo - son  
> cariño - honey/sweetie/dear/etc.   
> Japanese:  
> okaa-san - mom  
> otou-san - dad
> 
>  **Writing Notes**  
>  1) Fun fact: I came up with this before I wrote TL;TF. Specifically at 4:30 AM. Don't judge me.   
> 2) I am a notorious multi-shipper. Do I love me some Anahardt? Yup. But do I think the Ana/Sam tag is sad and in need of more content? SUPER YUP.   
> 3) We don't know much about Sam other than him being a) Fareeha's dad, b) married to Ana, and c) Canadian First Nations. As such, I've formed my own Sam, and I've made him a dork. Ana's sass had to be matched by somebody.   
> 4) Ana's about 51 here, so she's got that gorgeous silvery hair. Iconic. Did you know I would die for her?   
> 5) I've never been drunk, but I've seen videos of drunk people and gotten snapchats from drunk friends, so this is my approximation.   
> 6) I can now add "nipple piercings" to my illustrious google search history. Yes, you can indeed buy all of those rings/bars at various places on the interwebs. You're welcome.   
> 7) Why did Torbs leave them? Because he was sour about the bet. End of story. =  
> 8) Reinhardt fell for updog AND buttfor because my 16yo sibling texted me today and asked what pen4+pen5+pen6 is and I told her it was pen16. Have fun.   
> 9) Jesse was legally adopted by Jack and Gabe when he joined up at age 17. Since adult adoptions are a thing, they're also considering adopting Genji. It doesn't end up happening by Genji's own choosing, but he does still refer to them both as "dad" at times. 
> 
> I can be found on Tumblr as rina-san28 and Battle.net as rinasan28. I am taking requests - at least until the cheeto in charge reopens the government so I can go back to work - so hit me up with those suckers anywhere! Thank you for reading!


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